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16 October 2011 @ 01:42 am
fic, SPN: the backseat (Dean/Castiel), PG13  
Title: the backseat
Pairing: Dean/Castiel
Wordcount: 1300
Rating: PG13
Spoilers: until 6x20, then goes wildly AU.
Warnings: none really.
Disclaimer: SPN isn't mine. Sadly for me.
Summary: Everything reminds him of 2014 – except that it’s not entirely the same.
A/N: written for pann_cake for the five acts meme, round five: the prompts were apocalypse, kissing, cars and sharing (clothes, in this case). Posting it in another entry because I'm not feeling like splitting anything in more than one comment today. Using for hc_bingo, stranded/survival scenario. Title from Gaslight Anthem.

The car’s windows are covered in steam and Dean doesn’t bother to raise his hand to put a remedy to it. It wouldn’t be worth the effort – the weather is so humid that it would form again in minutes, and to be honest the sight isn’t really this great. They’re in a motel’s parking lot and the motel is falling over itself; no point in looking at it.

Everything reminds him of 2014 – except that it’s not entirely the same.

He keeps an eye on Sam, who’s sleeping in the passenger seat; he looks okay, the wall is holding up still, and if they have to die if and when Raphael decides to take a break from ruling Heaven after releasing the Croatoan virus all over again, he hopes that it doesn’t fall before it happens.

He stirs on the backseat, looking at his watch; it’s getting late, damn –

Someone knocks on the door and wipes away the steam from the windows; Dean is quick to raise the power locks and open the back door. Cas gets in with one swift motion, carrying a small backpack in one arm and putting a secure on the gun he had in the other; Dean locks the car from the inside again. (It’s proofed against demons and angels, too, but sometimes he likes to use the good, old human methods too.)

Dean takes a good look at him – he doesn’t look too bad, except that the Zeppelin shirt of Dean’s that he had been wearing now has a rip that wasn’t there before.

“What happened?” he asks.

“There was a Croat in the drug store,” Cas says. “I had to run through a broken window. I’m sorry.”

“It’s just a shirt,” Dean replies. “Heck, you can keep it by this point.”

He takes the backpack and glances at what’s inside – drugs, bandages, disinfectant; Cas did rob that store thoroughly.

“Good job,” Dean answers, throwing the backpack under the driver’s seat.

“Bobby called. He says he’ll meet up with us in a couple days from now if he isn’t derailed.”

Dean nods – Bobby always calls Cas, since his phone is the only one still working. Cas sits back against the seat, relaxing just slightly, but Dean can see it – something’s off. More than usual, at least.

“What’s going on?” he asks, voice soft.

“Nothing of import,” Cas answers. “I just wish I had found a way to prevent this,” he adds a second later.

Dean shakes his head, moving closer and forcing Cas to lie down on the seat; he draws an arm around Cas’s waist, so that they’re face to face. The backseat is barely enough for the both of them, but unless they move too much no one will fall off.

“Shut up. Hey, you followed my advice. I mean, you could have told me to fuck off and gone your way. You’d probably still have your halo, if anything.”

Cas shivers, moving closer so that his head is leaning on Dean’s shoulder; his grip on Dean’s hip is almost painful. “I was wrong,” he replies, keeping his voice low. “Using Purgatory’s souls would have ruined me. I don’t regret what I lost. It’s what everyone else lost that I regret.”

Dean never knows what to say at this kind of thing; he gets it even too well, but… he can’t really regret having asked Cas not to go through with whatever he and Crowley had planned. At least they still have each other, and maybe it’s because he can be a very selfish person, but he can’t bring himself to feel bad about any of this. After all, you can’t save the world forever, but you can try to keep your friends safe, can’t you?

Instead of answering, he leans back until his lips find Cas’s. He keeps the kiss slow, his hand finding the back of Cas’s neck; he moans when the former angel’s fingers start carding through his hair, his grip on Dean’s hip lessening slightly. His tongue finds Cas’s and he almost smiles into the kiss when Cas moans into his mouth; for some reason Cas never tastes of anything that he can name, not even since he lost his wings the second Raphael ordered all the angels back home and shut Heaven’s door. Dean kind of likes that; it should be creepy, but he can’t help thinking that it’s somehow fitting. When the kiss is over, he takes Cas’s bottom lip between his teeth, biting it gently; Cas’s cheeks are flushed and Dean’s heart beats slightly faster when Cas’s hand reaches up and covers his cheek.

“I told you already,” Cas breathes, barely audible. “I’d rather be here. Being in charge was miserable,” he adds, almost to himself. Dean almost chuckles at that, but he knows that Cas is being serious here and he knows enough about how things went up there.

“Damn,” Dean says, “we should really find ourselves a proper damned room.” There are things he’d like to do now, but none of them is advisable when his brother is sleeping in the passenger seat.

“I could do with sleeping in a bed,” Cas agrees. Dean does chuckle at that, moving so that his lips are against Cas’s ear.

“Just sleeping? I had other plans. Like maybe take that shirt off you. And everything else, too. After all, I haven’t shown you half of the perks of humanity,” he says, and he feels Cas shivering against him, his arms moving to Dean’s shoulders. Damn, Dean really wants to just take a night off so that he can have his way with Cas for as much time as they need; it hasn’t happened for a month and this godforsaken business of cuddling (damn, he hates that word) in the back of the car isn’t enough. He’s crap with words and he won’t ever manage to tell Cas everything he deserves to hear, but he could show him, if only they weren’t stuck in a backseat.

“I will… take a rain check then,” Cas answers, his tone almost hesitant when he finishes the sentence, as if he's trying to understand if he likes how it sounds. Then he kisses Dean’s pulse point, his hands reaching up again for his head, his long fingers running through Dean’s hair all over again, and it’s Dean’s turn to shiver. He curls closer to Cas, no space left between them.

“I’ll take first watch,” Dean says, eyeing the gun still tucked in the waistband of Cas’s jeans. (Or Dean’s jeans that went to Cas, but it’s not as if they had time to go clothes shopping and Dean doesn’t mind sharing. Not really.) “I’ll just wake Sam for the second round, he’s been out since you left for the drug store run. You can take the first tomorrow.”

“All right,” Cas replies, his head moving to rest on Dean’s shoulder. His breathing is almost evened out a minute after he closes his eyes – he must have been exhausted, but if you’re not adjusted to have a real human body Dean can only understand why you’d get tired easily.

He can’t resist pressing his lips to the top of Cas’s head, which is barely inches from his lips right now. “For what it’s worth, I’m glad you’re here,” he whispers, and he does it just because he’s sure that Cas won’t hear him. The two times he tried to say it out loud before, words got caught in his throat.

He gasps when one of Cas’s hands moves and finds his; Cas laces their fingers together and doesn’t say a thing. Dean can feel his own heart beating frantically; when Cas tries to move his hand away, he doesn’t let it go.

End.
 
 
feeling: okayokay
on rotation: The Horrible Crowes - Blood Loss | Powered by Last.fm
 
 
 
I want another pony: awesomecasverucasalt123 on October 16th, 2011 12:06 am (UTC)
This is one of the best Dean/Cas fics I've read in quite some time. You gave us a vivid portrait of the world they're living in now, and it's so easy to see how things could have gone that way. Thanks for posting, that was wonderful.
the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural + nick cave = otpjanie_tangerine on October 16th, 2011 11:36 am (UTC)
Aw, thanks! *feels flattered* I'm so glad that this worked for you and that the AR did - I thought that it was an interesting way to go so it's lovely to know you liked it. :) thanks again!
(Deleted comment)
the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural + nick cave = otpjanie_tangerine on October 16th, 2011 09:42 am (UTC)
Thanks so very much! :D ♥ I'm so glad that you liked this. And that the imagery worked for you, I thought it could have been an interesting alternative to write about..
DR Lisa!!dazedrose on October 16th, 2011 12:55 am (UTC)
You always write the most beautiful characters. They are canon to a 'T'. It's great to see a 'what if' so well done. Stunning
the female ghost of tom joad: misha halojanie_tangerine on October 16th, 2011 09:41 am (UTC)
Aw, thanks so much! ♥ I'm so glad that you liked it this much. <3
Giuliae0wyn on October 16th, 2011 11:24 am (UTC)
Awww, perfetta <3
the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural + nick cave = otpjanie_tangerine on October 16th, 2011 11:37 am (UTC)
Grazie! ♥ (mi sa che era quasi meglio se andava così.. XD)
Life is a test and I get bad marks: murderbydeathbadluck97 on October 16th, 2011 12:11 pm (UTC)

Haven't read it yet, but just wanted to say that is my favorite Gaslight song!

the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural + nick cave = otpjanie_tangerine on October 17th, 2011 10:04 am (UTC)
My personal favorite is probably Film Noir but the title one is my second. ;)
T: iniquitytriedunture on October 16th, 2011 03:08 pm (UTC)
Loved it. Scary to see Dean's 2014 world slowly coming to pass, but still good to see them together. I think that is a very human urge, to want to be together even if it's not the most logical thing to be doing in a time of crisis.
the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural dean/cas i like past you <3janie_tangerine on October 17th, 2011 10:08 am (UTC)
Thanks, much glad you liked it! At least I'm pretty sure that it isn't going to go the kind of bad that the original croatoan!verse did.. still I thought it could be interesting to give it a shot.
jem_018jem_018 on October 16th, 2011 04:27 pm (UTC)
This was just absolutely gorgeous. ♥♥♥

the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural castiel 6.0janie_tangerine on October 17th, 2011 10:09 am (UTC)
Thanks so much! ♥ I'm so glad that you liked it. :)
laura_iskralaura_iskra on October 16th, 2011 04:59 pm (UTC)
e' cosi'.. dolce nella sua desolazione, quasi quasi avrei preferito vedere questo scenario..

e comunque l'idea di cas e dean che si coccolano e' assolutamente deliziosa!
the female ghost of tom joad: ILUjanie_tangerine on October 17th, 2011 10:27 am (UTC)
Il problema è che quando l'ho finita ho pensato '.. porca miseria quasi era meglio se fosse successo sul serio' xD >___> della serie siamo messi proprio bene.. ;)

grazie mille, contentissima che sia piaciuta! :D ♥
morganlucas41: 503 d/c walkingmorganlucas41 on October 16th, 2011 08:07 pm (UTC)
Oh, this is beautiful. What a lovely take on what could have happened - and I adore this moment between the boys. Them huddling in the backseat - what an adorable image. I loved this! :)
the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural dean/cas bffs <3janie_tangerine on October 17th, 2011 10:13 am (UTC)
Bittersweet apocalypses where people huddle in cars are so much fun, aren't they? ;) I'm so glad that you liked it, thanks!
getting the chocolate in the peanut butterdotfic on October 16th, 2011 09:10 pm (UTC)
I love this, the atmosphere, and the way you have Dean and Cas curled up together in the back seat.
the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural dean/cas THEY HAVE A BONDjanie_tangerine on October 17th, 2011 10:17 am (UTC)
aw, thanks! I'm so glad that this worked for you ♥ and that the two of them did in the circumstances. Which I figured might be interesting to explore. :)
Pan: SPN- tie fixpann_cake on October 16th, 2011 09:14 pm (UTC)
Oh my goddddd!! I LOVE THIS SO MUCH. Seriously, you are too good to me. Where do I even begin??

First of all, thank you for avoiding season 7, I know it's annoying. :\ But I LOVE any kind of croatoan!verse, so this is really amazing. I love how it's definitely a desperate situation, but it's not totally unmanageable yet. I was glad to hear that Bobby is still around. It's so interesting to see the beginning of an apocalypse, rather than a full-blown world gone to hell.

Okay, the image of Cas in Dean's clothes is KILLING me with the cute. And he was all sad that he ripped Dean's Zeppelin shirt! Seriously, Cas is adorable here, I love how you write him.

And DEAN! *clutches heart* You captured so much of what I love about him. How he's always watching out for Sam, how he can tell right away that something is bothering Cas, that he wishes they had time to just be together. And Dean's slightly-dirty-talk is just too good. And this:

He’s crap with words and he won’t ever manage to tell Cas everything he deserves to hear, but he could show him, if only they weren’t stuck in a backseat.

<3333 That is so perfectly Dean. So is the ending, that he can only admit to Cas the he's glad Cas is here when he believes Cas to be asleep. I just love their give-and-take in this, that they don't necessarily need all the words to understand each other.

And of course the CUDDLING and the KISSING in the backseat of the car just KILLS ME. So amazing!

Thank you so so so much for writing me this! <333
the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural dean/cas THEY HAVE A BONDjanie_tangerine on October 17th, 2011 10:35 am (UTC)
Eee thank you! :DDD I'm so glad that you liked it! And ff S7 means that I need to go AU anyway, so doing it from S6 or S7 totally doesn't change anything for me. ;) And the croatoan verse might be one of my favorite things that SPN ever managed to do so I figured it'd be cool to bring it back in business and making it less horrible. XD (also I despise killing people off screen, so Bobby was totally going to stay alive. ;) )

I still feel robbed that we didn't get Cas wearing Dean's clothes unless you assume that 2014!Cas did. It'd have been so precious. :( but seriously I'm so glad that he worked for you here, I do love him but he can be a tough nut to crack most of the time so it's good to know that you liked how he was written. And that Dean did too. There are things I do love insanely about him (the ones you listed). Now if only he'd give up drinking.. :/

Also it's totally good to know that the whole backseat business worked for you - at least I wasn't making them THAT miserable. ;) I'm so glad that you liked it this much, thanks again! ♥
lover all alone: J2: cuddles!invisiblelove on October 17th, 2011 12:33 am (UTC)
*happy sigh* This was just wonderful!

“Using Purgatory’s souls would have ruined me.
IT DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIID ;_____________________;

Oh my goodness, thanks for a lovely AU that let me bask in denial of canon ;)
the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural dean/cas s7janie_tangerine on October 17th, 2011 10:26 am (UTC)
Ee, thank you!

I STILL FIRMLY THINK THAT NOT ALL IS LOST. SIGH.

And lol, you're totally welcome. I'll bask in denial with you. ;)
donovanspendonovanspen on October 17th, 2011 02:21 am (UTC)
Honestly, I don't know if I ever thought about what would happen if Cas abandoned his plan and Raphael was free to move forward with his. I like that Dean admitted that he was glad that Cas was there and that Cas heard it.
the female ghost of tom joad: tangerinesjanie_tangerine on October 17th, 2011 10:21 am (UTC)
I presume that it wouldn't have gone so swimmingly either, but it was nice to explore one possibility. And I'm really glad that they worked for you in this, thank you! (and I think Cas needed to hear that kind of stuff waay before the S6 finale, but.. yeah, right.)
(Deleted comment)
the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural + nick cave = otpjanie_tangerine on October 17th, 2011 10:23 am (UTC)
Aw, thanks so much!

And mmmh, I knew that this layout doesn't shrink automatically when you make the window smaller but I had no idea that it didn't fit in the browser - I only use Chrome so idk if it works in others. But I'll go check again, thanks for pointing that out. :)
darkslayerfaithdarkslayerfaith on October 17th, 2011 07:24 am (UTC)
I like this :D It was all nice and good!
the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural + nick cave = otpjanie_tangerine on October 17th, 2011 10:19 am (UTC)
Much glad you liked it, thank you! :D
dimensionallyt on October 17th, 2011 09:36 am (UTC)
I had this ridiculous hope that S6 was going to end up with Cas giving up the souls and S7 be a post-apocalyptic verse with Cas and Dean moving ever closer to their 2014 versions. It would have been completely logical and an utterly perfect turn of events. We still could have had monster-of-the-week. There would have been the seemingly obligatory brother angst as Lucifer and co could come back. Adam would have been out. And we could have had some new characters joining the fray (as all good apoc!verses do).

Pity it didn't happen and now we are stuck with no Cas and no grieving!Dean :'(

Sorry, that was a rant. Your fic inspired me. Great fic btw. Understated and moving. Thanks!
the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural dean/cas s7janie_tangerine on October 17th, 2011 10:30 am (UTC)
Nah, don't apologize, it happens that I'd have totally liked that option better either. My general idea was like 'okay, Cas ends up de-souled and graceless and he's going to fall and stick at Bobby's until stuff goes to hell in some other way', and then.. yeeeaaaah right. I totally like your option better than mine though. :(

And that stated, thanks! :D I'm really glad that it worked for you and that you liked it. ♥
I gave it all for you by my side once more.gaveitallforyou on October 17th, 2011 04:03 pm (UTC)
Really really lovely <3
the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural CAS IS A SPECIAL SNOWFLAKEjanie_tangerine on October 17th, 2011 06:11 pm (UTC)
Glad you liked it, thanks! :D
~ji.jihime47 on October 17th, 2011 07:27 pm (UTC)
i'm not going to lie, i'd love to see more of this 'verse. there's so few fanfics where cas decides to follow dean's advice in 6x20, and this one is a perfect fix-it-but-not-really for s6. *still refuses to believe that anything that happened in the show after 7x01 is canon*
the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural + nick cave = otpjanie_tangerine on October 17th, 2011 09:04 pm (UTC)
I kind of like the idea so if I ever get the inspiration I might write more of this, but considering how much crap I should be finishing right now I wouldn't know. XD Still, thanks so much! I'm really glad that it worked for you, especially since I'm kind of sure that if Cas had gone with Dean's advice things would have ended pretty badly too (I mean it's not like Raphael was going to pull out a white flag), but I figured that exploring it was worth a shot. Also I'm watching this show being like 'ffff come on we all know Cas isn't dead PLEASE HURRY UP WITH THE REST AND HAVE HIM SHOW UP AGAIN THANK YOU'. I don't know how healthy it is...
~ji.jihime47 on October 18th, 2011 05:54 am (UTC)
knowing what i know now i'd rather raphael won and started apocalypse 2.0 than what we got in s7. it just makes no sense, getting rid of a fan favourite, seriously. and he doesn't even get a mention in episodes right now, even though it makes sense that he should.

if you need motivation, i'm sitting here, waving my fangirl pom-poms :3
the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural + nick cave = otpjanie_tangerine on October 18th, 2011 08:11 am (UTC)
Lol all things considered I might have liked that better too. :/ I don't really get what they're doing especially because while I'm not technically hating it I'm not liking this plan of (apparently) going back to the S1/3 basics (S2 HAD A SUPPORTING CAST) aka the times when they risked cancellation even before the season was over. :/ I don't like to think that they're going with what the fanbase who wanted to be done with the angels/apocalypse/huge mytharc wants, but if it's the case I shall be very disappointed. :/

Anyway lol what I need is longer days and someone to do my uni work for me, but I'll see what happens. ;)
i want to huggle you (and your little dog, too): d/c rather hereblue_fjords on October 18th, 2011 01:11 pm (UTC)
Argh, so sweet and gentle. I mean, horrible things happening, yes, but that's outside the car. In the car there is some sweet and gentle love, and I love it!
the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural dean/cas s7janie_tangerine on October 20th, 2011 09:52 am (UTC)
Exactly! Who cares about what's outside the car? ;) thanks so much, I'm so glad that you liked it! :)
cassiopeia7: Cas&Dean: 2014cassiopeia7 on October 24th, 2011 03:05 am (UTC)
Oh, my gosh, this is LOVELY! Janie, you know these characters better than they do themselves -- I don't know how you so consistently get them so right, but I'm certainly glad that you do. &hearts Thank you so much for sharing this.
the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural dean/cas i like past you <3janie_tangerine on October 25th, 2011 04:03 pm (UTC)
Thank you! :DDD I'm so glad that you liked this, and woah, that was a compliment! ;) now if only I could be their therapist... ;) thanks so much for reading! :D
neurawkwardneurawkward on October 26th, 2011 04:05 am (UTC)
<3
the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural + nick cave = otpjanie_tangerine on October 26th, 2011 09:48 pm (UTC)
thanks for reading! :D (and if I guessed right and you liked it, I'm so glad that you did. ;) )
neurawkwardneurawkward on October 27th, 2011 11:56 pm (UTC)
Sorry! When I commented I was just awake enough to love this, but too tired to write anything coherent. ;) Still awesome upon second reading, by the way. :D
Kevin Jonesmulder200 on November 7th, 2011 04:26 pm (UTC)
Ah! Even if the world has gone to Hell, they still have each other.
eo;  ayelharrywells on February 27th, 2012 08:17 am (UTC)
Ah, this is wonderful.