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28 October 2010 @ 05:11 pm
fic, SPN: flutter and wow (Sam/Dean/Castiel), NC17, for spnthreesome  
[I swear I'll make a real post and answer things and everything I should do tomorrow, the next day at latest. I barely managed to finish this one on time eeewww. Actually I'm late but whatever.]

Title: flutter and wow
Pairing: Sam/Dean/Castiel
Rating: NC17
Words: 5800+
Spoilers: set some very short time after 5x14
Warnings: consensual threesome which is also 2/3 incestuous. Also most of this is porn and x-rated stuff happens. There's some double penetration happening, if you see it that way.
Summary: It would be so easy to label it wrong. It would be so easy to think a lot of things. But everything Castiel can think, if he looks at them, is that it’s true that nothing is ever really as easy as it seems. Or, where Castiel is watching things he shouldn't but neither Dean or Sam mind it. All the contrary.
A/N: written for nicky2007 at the spnthreesome exchange. I used snowed in and candles as prompts, then as for the likings I should have covered oral sex, some dirty talk, halFway fallen Cas and I hope it's sweet enough? Sorry about the wing kink but it was getting too crowded already. XD So basically this is, uh, porn without much of a plot, and that much of a plot takes probably too much space (and this wasn't supposed to be this long), but I just hope it works. And I just hope you like it and that it fits the bill. :D Title stolen from Elvis Costello.

There’s just candlelight around them. There’s also the sound of hail pounding against the window, true, but that’s almost remote.

(The storm killed the nearest source of electricity, which in turn meant that the entirety of Bobby’s house is currently in the darkness except where candles are lit. Castiel wouldn’t even be here, but after the whole deal with Famine he had decided to stay until he was sure that Sam was truly well and that Dean wasn’t thinking about saying yes anymore. Because he knows he has been thinking about it.)

The sound, it’s remote because it’s not the only one Castiel hears.

Before it, come words that are being exchanged, and clothes rustling, and soft, aborted moans.

Castiel had been just sitting on an armchair in the living room where Dean and Sam had brought sleeping bags, saying that it would have been safer and more practical if they all were in the same place. Not to mention that they didn’t have enough candles to spare anyway.

He had felt tired enough to decide he should get some rest. After all, it’s just been a day since his mouth stopped tasting of blood and raw meat. Which is why they probably both assumed he was sleeping and they’re… doing what they’re doing.

Not that Castiel hadn’t known before; he had raised Dean from Hell and remade him inch by inch. There’s nothing he doesn’t know about him. What exactly used to happen between him and his brother included.

He knows that the way Dean and Sam used and use to touch, when it’s dark, isn’t the way brothers usually touch each other. He knows it was different before Dean went to Hell. Since he came back, it’s been stolen touches and they started again just after Ruby died, but tentatively. Just touches and maybe something more, but nothing of import. He doesn’t know it because he spends his time creeping on them, as Dean said once; it’s all written in their souls, and he can’t help seeing it.

One would think he would judge it, but he has learned to care for the both of them, and he won’t be the one casting stones when he has so many questions and when he’s hardly the first person who can cast any kind of moral judgment, by now. (These are times when he thinks of Anna and he tries not to.)

There’s something strangely endearing, about the way Dean and Sam’s faces are framed by that soft, warm, frail light. The flames flutter and the light does along with them; Castiel could see perfectly in the dark, he still can, but he’s choosing not to. He knows he shouldn’t be watching them. It’s wrong, and they obviously think he’s sleeping or resting or not paying attention. Otherwise, why would they try to be so quiet?

He can’t help it, though. They’re touching tentatively, like two people discovering (or rediscovering?) each other; he can barely see their faces, and never both at once, but Dean’s eyes show hints of desperation and maybe disbelief, while Sam’s… Sam just looks like someone who wants to make amends. They don’t speak, Castiel figures because of the possibly excessive noise. Nothing they are doing is sexual, right now. It’s just Sam’s hands tracing Dean’s cheekbones and Dean’s either covering Sam’s heart or stopping on Sam’s hip while they lie over the two sleeping bags on the ground. If Castiel concentrates, he can hear their breathing over the sound of hail pounding over the window.

It would be so easy to label it wrong. It would be so easy to think a lot of things. But everything Castiel can think, if he looks at them, is that it’s true that nothing is ever really as easy as it seems. That nothing is black and white. Because the only thing one can infer from what’s in front of his eyes, is that they love each other, so much and so strongly that it transcends everything else. Even if their bond has been proved and twisted and almost broken in every possible way. It’s something almost absolute, and Castiel can only think of how angels are never really alone. Angels can always hear each other and they don’t know loneliness; Castiel, right now, does. After being cut from Heaven this long, he knows it even too well. And how can he fault Dean and Sam, when for most of their lives each other was all they had?

Rather than casting stones, he envies them a bit. He feels ridiculous at harboring such a thought, but at least they still do have each other and lately he doesn’t even know if what he’s doing is worth the effort.

But watching them at least reminds him what he’s doing it for. The way they’re smiling at each other makes Castiel feel a bit warmer, and if for a second he wishes it was for him to experience, too, no one can fault him.

Still, he doesn’t dare moving. He sits, keeping his eyes half-open and his head in the dark so that they can’t see him. He doesn’t want to disturb them, but he doesn’t even want to go anywhere else, even if it would be the right thing to do. He focuses on Sam leaning forward and closing a small, almost insignificant gap, and kiss Dean like he isn’t sure if it’s allowed or not. Dean jerks forward and kisses him back, almost desperate, his hands gripping on Sam’s shirt so hard that his knuckles start to become white. Castiel can’t help looking, he can’t, not as they seem to be devouring each other, but then he sees Sam’s leg moving backward and hitting one of the candles. And Bobby’s floor is made of wood.

Castiel knows that this will just bring trouble, but he can’t exactly let everyone burn alive either, and he’s fallen enough that he couldn’t extinguish a fire with a thought anymore.

It happens in a couple of seconds.

Sam abruptly breaks the kiss, Dean curses and Castiel is kneeling at their feet with the candle in his hand. He gripped it in the middle, where there’s melting, hot wax, but the pain he feels is dull, and he places it back just because he knows it would harm him in the long run.

“You… you saw it all?” Sam whispers, and Castiel figures that he owes him to hold eye contact, at least. He nods once, and glances in Dean’s direction. Of the two, he’s the one looking slightly ashamed, but Sam’s face remains carefully neutral.

“And?” Sam asks, still cautious.

“I am not judging you, if it’s what you are asking,” Castiel answers. “But… I could not… I could not look away,” he says, feeling ashamed, and Dean sits up on one elbow.

“Why couldn’t you?” he whispers, and Castiel thinks that, in comparison to how lifeless his eyes have looked since Famine, this is an improvement.

Castiel wishes he could answer that. He really wishes he had the human words to put his thoughts into shape. But they’re escaping him, human words always escape him most times; he shakes his head and then turns his head to look outside the window. It’s shaking with the force of the hail hitting it.

“Maybe sometimes I need a reminder of what I am doing everything for,” he settles on, “but I realize this is not my place. I will…”

Sam’s hand closes around his wrist and Castiel almost gasps. He’s quiet while Sam turns his head and looks at Dean, raising an eyebrow, and then Dean meets his stare and gives him a small but firm nod. Castiel doesn’t have an idea of what’s going on, he doesn’t dare hope that they’ll say they don’t mind, but…

“So, you just want to watch?” Sam asks then, and Castiel has to swallow before answering.

“If you’d let me.”

“Well, I’ll admit that it would be kind of hot,” Dean says, his tone amused and warm, even if he still sounds tired, “but hey, we’re in this together, aren’t we?”

Castiel just stares at him, not really processing the information, and then Sam shakes his head and grips Castiel’s wrist tighter.

“Well, this, me and him, we hadn’t really… been like this in a while. And it’s all different now, isn’t it? And we did kind of talk about it when you were comatose. But to be honest I thought you would have flown away as soon as –”

“Sam, it’s written all over your souls. I should have… flown away a long time ago, according to your reasoning” Castiel can’t help interrupting, and Dean lets out a snort.

“Shit, only you could see this from someone’s soul. But… you’re… just, cool with it?”

“You love each other,” Castiel states, because it’s true and it’s enough of an explanation for now. What’s two people in the face of the end of the world, after all? “And I care for the both of you. Should I not be… cool with it, if you both were happy? In these particular circumstances? I have learned what a perspective is, Dean.”

Dean almost blushes at that, but then he shakes his head and Sam tugs on Castiel’s wrist. Which has been in Sam’s hand all this time.

“Well, what he meant before, when he said we’re in this together, was that… you aren’t the only one who gives a damn, you know.”

Castiel asks the next question very slowly. “Are you implying that –”

“Sam, be straightforward for once. I meant, if you want to join, you can just say it,” Dean blurts, his cheeks definitely gaining color, and it would almost be endearing, but not with what Dean has just said.

Castiel turns to Sam, who just gives him a nod to confirm that yes, he and Dean are on the same page here, and Castiel takes a long breath. His heartbeat has significantly sped up and his left hand has shakes for a couple of seconds. He can’t help wondering if the warmth he’s currently feeling, blooming from somewhere inside him which he can’t place, would disappear if he said no. But in the past months he has learned what’s loneliness and grief and misery, and if he thinks about the way Dean’s face seemed lit from the inside, before, as Sam touched his cheek… he doesn’t know if he wants to say no.

It’s not like he hasn’t done everything he has done for Dean in the first place, because he thinks things of Dean that no angel should think of a human. It’s not like along the way he hasn’t learned that Sam wasn’t just an abomination with demon blood. It’s not like he wouldn’t risk his life for them all over again. It’s not like he doesn’t care for them more… more than he cares for himself, at this point.

He moves forward and reaches up with one hand and it lands on Sam’s shoulder. Even kneeling, Sam is taller than him, but he bends down, their eyes still not breaking contact. It’s not that much of a distance, and Castiel just stops thinking. He’s about to close that space when a hand closes on his shoulder and Dean is right up in his… personal space, and apparently it isn’t an issue now.

“Cas, lose the damn coat first.”

Alright, maybe in comparison to the both of them, Castiel is overly dressed. And the coat does get in the way. So he loses it and places it next to the sleeping bags, and then he turns back to both Sam and Dean. And the latter grabs his arm and pulls him forward.

“That’d be better. And sorry, Sammy, but I got dibs here,” he breathes, and then he moves forward and kisses Castiel.

It’s not harsh or invasive or intrusive; Dean doesn’t really force anything, but when Castiel parts his lips after a few beats, Dean’s lips start moving against his and his tongue meets Castiel’s and oh. It feels strange at the beginning, but then it’s all warmth and intimacy; there’s something in the gentleness and care Dean is putting into kissing him that makes something inside Castiel flutter, for a couple of seconds. He kisses back, mimicking Dean’s motions until he’s sure that he’s doing it right if only because Dean’s hands are gripping his hips hard and he lets out a soft moan into Cas’s mouth. He gasps for breath when it’s over, but he barely has time to take it before he’s literally snatched away.

“Well, that was very nice, but Dean, I was first,” Sam says, the tone light, and Castiel hasn’t heard him sound so sure of himself in a lot of time. Then Sam kisses him as well.

It’s completely different from Dean, and completely different from the way Sam kissed Dean before, too. It’s harsher, more forceful, but when Castiel parts his lips and meets Sam’s tongue and gets the rhythm, it feels equally amazing. It’s like there’s a fire burning and not just that pleasurable warmth, and it doesn’t make his stomach flutter but it makes it clench. And he needs more than a breath when it’s over.

“Wow,” Dean says, “I’m pretty sure you weren’t as wild with Chastity.”

Castiel groans at the mere mention of the name, and Sam shakes his head and moves towards Dean, pushing him down on the sleeping bag. Dean, to Castiel’s surprise, goes without protesting once.

“Haven’t you embarrassed the poor guy enough for eternity?” Sam asks, shaking his head, and then kisses Dean into the mattress the same way he did with Castiel before, and Castiel can’t just take his eyes off them. They fit so nicely against each other, and Castiel can’t stop staring at how Sam’s hand covers Dean’s cheek almost entirely as he cups it. They kiss like it’s familiar now, like it’s not a question of re-learning how to do it, and there’s heat pooling down, towards Castiel’s waist.

It had started before, but now it’s enough to distract him from what’s in front of him, and he barely restrains himself from pushing a hand down beneath his trousers. It would not do, not now, and so he takes his jacket off instead. As soon as he’s done with it, he realizes that the kiss is over and when Dean nods, his cheeks flushed, he crawls closer and leans down, placing his lips over Dean’s swollen ones. Sam takes off his own shirt while Castiel kisses Dean again, slow, maybe almost languid, exploring Dean’s mouth as much as he can, and when they part Dean is the one gasping.

“You like doing things right, don’t you?” he breathes, and Castiel can just nod.

“Well, I’d say that thorough is good,” Sam agrees as he moves forward, and then he looks at Castiel. “You know, you don’t look like you’re doing this for the first time,” he says, his face a mix of perplexed and embarrassed. Castiel almost lets out the ghost of a laugh.

“I have existed for centuries,” Castiel says, and Dean has the grace to look at least a bit sheepish at that. Castiel would also like to add that he hadn’t really been interested, at the brothel, but he lets that go. He thinks that he has made his point well enough, and then Sam snorts and looks at the both of them in a way that Castiel would call fond.

“Now that we know that everyone’s got the bases covered, what about talking a bit less?” Dean says, sounding like he wants to change the topic, and then Sam sends Castiel’s way a smirk that is downright worthy of the devil himself.

“Well then, what do you say if we put that conversation last day into practice?”

Dean looks at the both of them like they’ve just grown another head, and Castiel remembers at once what Sam means.

Mainly, that two days ago he went to Sam telling him that he was worried about Dean and that he had heard him screaming up at the sky for the entire time Sam was in the panic room. And Sam had complained that lately if you tried to give Dean a hand he’d push you away. They both had concluded that yes, things looked very bad, and yes, maybe they should both keep an eye on him more closely than before, if possible.

“I think it’s a good idea,” Castiel answers, and before Dean can say what Castiel has leaned down and he kisses him the way Sam kissed him first, and he doesn’t know why he’s sure that Sam would have moved behind Dean but Sam does. Maybe he still can figure out what someone’s thinking to do, which is a pleasing thought. Dean is breathless again when they part and then Sam’s hand is on Cas’s shirt and he’s being brought forward. They kiss over Dean’s shoulder and Castiel can feel Dean growing harder against his leg.

“I think everyone’s too clothed in here,” Dean mutters, and Castiel would be inclined to agree. And he might have not much grace to spare, but there’s something he can still do, and in a blink all the clothes they were still wearing are folded away on the ground.

“Convenient,” Dean comments, and then something else he had to say dies in his throat when Sam’s hand reaches forward and wraps around Dean’s hard-on. Castiel is still hovering above Dean, but he leaves Sam enough space, and he looks down, almost enraptured, as Sam’s hand slowly starts stroking up and down. The more he does it, the more Dean’s face relaxes slightly, and Castiel breathes deeply, aware that his heartbeat’s rate is speeding up.

He leans down, slowly, so that he can lick a stripe along Dean’s collarbone, and Dean shivers before reaching up with his hands and bringing Cas down. Sam momentarily moves his hand away, but then it sneaks between the two of them and it wraps around both of their erections. Castiel can’t help letting out the moan escaping his lips, marveling at how good the friction is, and he shivers as he thinks that Sam is doing this with just one hand. He raises his eyes and looks at Sam, whose cheeks are flushed. His hair is sticking to his forehead and he licks his lips for a second before bending his head down and biting softly on Dean’s shoulder. Dean whimpers and thrusts up against Castiel, and Castiel feels blood and heat rush inside him, or maybe it’s his blood which is burning, he can’t say. If he moves just a bit, he can feel his erection slide against Dean’s, without much of a friction now, and it’s an equally delicious feeling. Except that then Sam takes his hand away and sits up straighter, his other arm still around Dean’s waist.

“I think we should show him a nice time,” he whispers leaning down next to Dean’s ear. “Maybe you should take care of it while I worry about something else,” he suggests then, and Dean shoots him a look and then nods, turning to Cas.

“Come on, flip down. I’m sure Chastity never did what I’m about to do, to you at least” he says, his voice confident like it has rarely been lately, and Castiel just nods and waits for Sam to move. He takes Sam’s place, noticing that the sleeping bags are warm from body heat, and then Dean’s hands are on his waist keeping him still, and his mouth is tracing a line that goes from his sternum to his groin. The more Dean does this, the more Castiel shivers and feels himself growing harder, and then Dean winks at him and wraps his mouth around Castiel’s achingly hard cock, and Castiel gasps grasping the sheets with his hands.

“Oh yes,” he hears Sam murmuring, “this is going to be so hot,” he mutters while placing himself on the floor behind Dean, and Castiel can barely keep his eyes open when Dean flickers his tongue under his cock and then proceeds to take it in deeper. Castiel watches his erection disappear slowly inside Dean’s mouth, inch by inch, Dean’s lips dark and stretching around it and his cheeks suddenly hollow; then Dean begins to move his head up and down and oh, Castiel hadn’t thought it’d be so… so… he would say good, but it doesn’t really cover it. Dean keeps up a steady motion, his head raising up and down, sucking down and then using his tongue once in a while. It swirls beneath the head once in a while, and Castiel can just try not to thrust his hips upwards too much in order not to make Dean uncomfortable; but at some point Dean stops for a second. Castiel looks down, to see why did he ever do it, and…

Well, he had a good reason, since Sam is slowly pushing one finger inside Dean’s opening while Dean slowly starts up again, even if the entire length of his erection isn’t inside Dean’s mouth anymore.

Castiel moans when Dean’s lips close around the head of his erection again, sucking faster, and Castiel notices that Sam is moving that finger inside out, very slowly, while the other hand is over the small of Dean’s back.

“Do you like it?” he asks then, all heat and confidence, too, and this is a side of Sam Winchester Castiel hasn’t really seen until now. He can’t say he doesn’t like it, though.

“Yes,” he breathes, his voice almost inaudible while Dean takes him in deeper again.

“I know you would. He hates it when I say it, but his mouth is just made for that, isn’t it?” and then Sam pushes that finger inside, and if Dean’s cheeks blush slightly Castiel does notice it, but he doesn’t do anything or try to make a retort.

Castiel feels himself growing harder still, if it’s even possible, and he can see spit dripping out of the corner of Dean’s mouth, and pre-come is smeared on his lips and chin, and his eyes are half closed, but he can see a glint in them when their stares meet. And then Dean swallows him whole again and Castiel thinks he’s this close to coming. He lets one his hands reach Dean’s hair, his fingers tangling in it, hoping it’s enough of a warning, but Dean just slows down and runs his tongue under the head again.

That’s it; Castiel is shaking and coming right down Dean’s throat and he can’t keep his eyes open, not for this, not when his entire body is shaking and there’s pleasure shooting up through his muscles, and Dean is still working on him even as he swallows down. He doesn’t even know what Sam is doing right now, but right this moment Castiel can’t think about that, too. He doesn’t know how long it lasts, but he knows that when he opens his eyes again he feels blessed out and Dean is licking Castiel’s own come off his groin with a smirk on his face that says a lot about the fact that he knows how much Castiel liked this.

“Woah,” Sam mutters from somewhere behind Dean, and Castiel can see that he’s still working Dean open. Actually, he must have added one finger, or why would Dean’s smirk have faded and his eyes closed? “That was quite the show, you know?” he says, sounding appreciative. “Enjoyed yourself?”

“Very much,” Castiel answers, his voice hoarse, moving closer.

“Good. It looked that way,” Sam agrees, and Dean groans.

“Fuck, Sam, enough with the talk–” he starts, and then he moans instead. Castiel moves a bit so that he’s looking over Dean’s shoulder and he sees that Sam is scissoring his fingers inside Dean, and Dean’s knees are actually trembling.

“That’s too bad,” Castiel says then, deciding that he’ll just go with the flow here. “Why don’t I just show you exactly how much I liked it?” he asks then, and shares a look with Sam. Sam stares for a second and then smirks, nodding and taking his fingers away, and before Dean can protest, Castiel has an arm around his waist. He brings Dean forward so that Castiel has his back against the wall and the sleeping bags are under the both of them, while Dean is right in his lap with his back to Sam and his legs spread.

“This would be more comfortable for all of us, I think?”

Sam nods, kneeling on the ground while naked isn’t probably the best way to enjoy yourself, and he moves closer so that he’s right behind Dean.

“Good point. Will you take care of him while I finish?”

“With pleasure,” Castiel answers, and Dean makes a face.

“The heck are you –”

Castiel shuts him up with a kiss and he knows that Sam has resumed his fingering when Dean whimpers inside his mouth. Castiel runs his tongue along Dean’s lips, cleaning him of white stickiness, and it tastes bitter but the good kind of bitter. He runs it also over Dean’s chin, which was still dirty with spit, and Dean is moaning incoherently. He’s warm and shaking with pleasure against Castiel, and when Sam moves even closer he’s like a prisoner between the two of them, but he doesn’t look adverse to it at all. Castiel places a kiss to Dean’s collarbone and takes the chance to have a look at what Sam is doing, and Sam is up to three fingers now. They slide in easily enough, and Dean shakes against Castiel when Sam crooks them; he also grows harder against Castiel’s stomach and Castiel can feel himself getting slightly interested again. But it’s a natural reaction, isn’t it?

Castiel shares another look with Sam while he sucks lightly on the place where he kissed Dean first.

“Cas, fuck, are you even…” Dean starts, obviously not managing to finish the sentence.

“I believe I’m just learning from what I see,” Castiel ends calmly, and when Dean’s head falls against his neck he nods towards Sam and they kiss over Dean’s shoulder. It’s long and Sam takes care to kiss him as thoroughly as he can manage, and he’s breathless when they part but Sam looks pretty pleased.

“You’re a fast learner,” Sam mutters, and then presses a bottle of lube into Castiel’s hand.

“Mind giving me a hand here?” he asks, and Castiel nods before spreading some on his palm. Sam kneels and Castiel reaches out to place it over Sam’s cock, which at this point is so hard to the touch that Castiel doesn’t understand how he can’t come from touch alone. He tries to be as neutral as possible and Sam nods at him, obviously appreciating, and all the while Sam still kept his fingers inside Dean, who has been moaning and swearing into Castiel’s shoulder.

“Will one of you two damn teases just fuck me already?” Dean mutters against Castiel’s shoulder and Sam smirks.

“You asked for it,” Sam snorts back, and then he pushes inside Dean with one single thrust.

Dean goes still against Castiel for a second and then he freezes, half pushing back and half moving forward. Castiel figures it will solve everything if he moves closer, and when he does there’s barely any space left between the three of them. Dean’s cock is hard against Castiel’s stomach and Sam’s hands are one on Dean’s hip and the other on Castiel’s shoulder; for a second, Castiel feels absolutely and completely connected to the two of them, in the same way he was when he still had his full status. He feels them in a way he never could until now; it’s almost like for a second they’re one thing, and then Sam starts moving and it shatters.

In a good way though; as soon as Sam starts moving Dean grinds back against Castiel and Sam picks up the pace. In a little while Sam is nothing short of slamming inside Dean and Castiel is still holding them both up. (He still has more strength than the two of them combined.)

And it’s making him feel hot all over, his blood pulsing inside his veins, but he doesn’t want to just sit back and watch while he keeps Dean up. He still can hold Dean up and do something, and then he just does what comes to him. He moves one of his hands up to Dean’s mouth and pushes a couple of fingers inside parted lips; Dean wets them almost on reflex, his eyes hazy and his pupils blown, and then Castiel takes them away and replaces them with his mouth. As he does, he moves his hand down, beneath Dean’s leg. He finds his entrance and when Sam moves out just a bit before thrusting back in, he pushes his fingers inside so that Sam’s cock slides against them, too.

Sam groans, almost surprised, and stills for a second before throwing a wink in Castiel’s direction and moving back. Castiel moves them forward, then backward as Sam thrusts again, and by then Dean has been muttering nonsense against Castiel’s shoulder. He’s past incoherence by now, but his eyes are so alive right now that Castiel would weep in joy, if this wasn’t the wrong situation.

He and Sam keep on moving almost in sync, until Dean shakes hard and comes all over Castiel’s stomach and his own, hard and messy and with a sigh of pleasure that makes Castiel shiver before grabbing Dean’s arms and keeping him still through the aftershocks. Then it’s not just aftershocks anymore because Sam comes too and it’s just as hard. He thrusts inside one last time, burying himself deep, and Castiel can barely manage to drag his fingers out before Sam shivers and comes inside Dean. It falls down Dean’s thighs as Sam shakes through his orgasm and Castiel takes a second to look at their faces. The both of them are wracked with pleasure and they both look a lot better now than they did six hours ago, and Castiel doesn’t really have much trouble with holding the both of them up.

When Sam finally stills, too, there’s maybe thirty seconds in which neither of them moves and then Sam pulls out of Dean and kneels back on the sleeping bags. Dean lets out a small gasp and tumbles forward, but Castiel catches him so that he doesn’t hit his head against the wall. He still seems pretty out of it, from the way his eyes are half-closed.

“Fuck,” Dean mutters a second later, “if I’d known it, we’d have done this a lot sooner.” He’s close to slurring by now and Castiel just shakes his head and moves so that Dean is laying on his back. Sam snorts and moves over to Dean’s other side. Pulled together, the sleeping bags are still enough for three people to lie on. None of the candles has toppled over even if there are just three or four lit by now, and it’s not hailing anymore.

“How didn’t we crush you?” Sam mutters, looking from himself to Dean to Castiel in half-disbelief.

“Sam, I’m still stronger than the both of you.” Castiel realizes he sounds annoyed enough but Sam just shakes his head and glances at Dean.

“Uh. He’s out.”

Castiel looks closer. Yes, Dean is most definitely out, as Sam says. Then Sam lets out a chuckle.

“I’m going to tease him forever about this.”

“Why would you?”

You are the virgin and he is the one who passes out? Come on. From his point of view, it would totally be funny. If he wasn’t the one passing out,” Sam remarks, and then lies down with one hand on Dean’s waist. Castiel can’t deny his point and then takes a breath, moving to stand up. Now that it’s over it feels like he’s overstaying his welcome, and it was already enough that he could share this.

Then Sam moves and grabs his arm.

“Are you going somewhere?”

“I… I just figure you two would want…”

Sam stares at him a handful of seconds, then shakes his head and lets out a sigh.

“These are the times when I understand why you and Dean just get along so well.”


“Always assuming the worst. Cas, chill out and lie down. Do you think that after this I’d kick you out, seeing that he’s not having a say in this?”

Castiel stares back at Sam, feeling his own eyes widen slightly, and even if his ability to feel souls is slipping, there’s still enough of it to know that Sam means it. And if Sam means it then Dean would agree, and he finds himself giving Sam a short, grateful nod before lying back down, too. He props himself up on one elbow and Sam mirrors him.

“Seriously. Man, it’s the three of us. And me and Dean, we hadn’t… we hadn’t done this in a while. A freaking long while. Don’t feel like you’re… I don’t know, crashing the party or intruding or shit. I learned to like you, just so you know.”

“I learned to like you as well,” Castiel answers earnestly, and then he sees Sam shiver. Castiel doesn’t, but outside it’s still raining and the room is probably chilly, by human standards. But if they’re going to stay like this then the sleeping bags won’t do, and so Castiel figures that sacrificing a bit of his remaining grace to conjure up some blankets, for once, isn’t that bad of a sacrifice.

The blanket appears and Sam looks at him and shakes his head again. “I could kiss you,” he mutters, pulling the blanket up, and Castiel just leans forward.

“I never said you couldn’t,” he answers, straight, and Sam looks at him like he’s grown another head for a second, but then he moves forward and he does kiss him, even if it’s slow and brief in comparison to the others.

“Aren’t you one who learns quickly,” Sam mutters.

“Will you two just stop the talking and let me get some goddamn sleep?” Dean mutters from down there, sounding more amused than anything, and Sam just looks down at him and then at Castiel again. Considering that Dean has avoided sleeping for more than three hours each night, lately… Castiel nods at Sam and lies down on the sleeping bag. Sam follows suit and they move, so that there’s almost no space between the three of them. Sam’s arm goes around Dean’s waist and Castiel’s hand slowly moves up to cover the scar on his arm, and it feels strangely peaceful. Not much has been peaceful lately. But Dean is fast asleep and Sam is not a long while later. Castiel remains where he is, wishing he felt any need to join them or that he actually knew how to. He doesn’t, but… well, this all started with him watching over the both of them. It can’t be that bad if it ends the same way, can it?

He settles down and it does.

feeling: tiredtired
sevvy23: canon errorsevvy23 on October 28th, 2010 09:18 pm (UTC)
OMG can u excuse me for a while? i need to take 3 cold showerw then try to fix this puddle thing that used to be my brain...
Seriously it was SO FREAKING HOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOW!!
Seing Sam and Dean so close, so caring just broke my heart into a million pieces, given what's happening in canon nowadays. And i think the Cas pov was a brilliant idea, you perfectly translate his need to belong, his fascination for humanity, his love for the brothers...
Oh, and this line? "It’s not like he doesn’t care for them more… more than he cares for himself, at this point." <333
Pure gold.Really. I couldn't explain why it touched so much, but... i guess it's just really nice to see this fact finally being aknowledge.

Anyway i know you had a hard time with this one but it's a freaking success! Well done hun!!
the female ghost of tom joad: psycho fanficjanie_tangerine on October 28th, 2010 09:32 pm (UTC)
I'll excuse you for all the time you want! ;) Heck, considering that I was going on no plot at all and I was desperately trying to compensate for it on the porn front, if you need three cold showers then I did it right. ;) ;)

But seriously, thanks so much. And I'm soso glad that the Sam/Dean worked for you because while I ship/read it/read a hell of a lot of it I write it... almost never, so I just didn't want to screw that up. And I've been cursing at myself for a week because Castiel was giving me hell and Dean would have been so much easier of a POV, but I wanted to do it because I wanted to stress all the stuff you said about him. And I like myself a challenge. Except that Dean is still easier. ;)

And thanks again!! :DD I'm so glad that you liked it that much. And I hope you have a nice shower. ;) ;)
(no subject) - shadwrayvn on October 29th, 2010 01:18 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - janie_tangerine on October 29th, 2010 10:35 pm (UTC) (Expand)
rock_chick_333: Sam Dean Casrock_chick_333 on October 28th, 2010 09:22 pm (UTC)
Oh. My. God. For that, I'm breaking out my hot new Sam-Dean-Cas icon! ♥

*crawls away to bunk*
the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural team free will #2janie_tangerine on October 28th, 2010 09:30 pm (UTC)
Eheee, I hope you have a good time in your bunk, and thank you! ;)

nightrider101: SPN Cas Slash Gospelnightrider101 on October 28th, 2010 10:24 pm (UTC)

Malfunction! Does not compute!!

the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural -> generaljanie_tangerine on October 29th, 2010 10:25 pm (UTC)
*hands fan in hope to stop the melting* well, if I sent you into malfunction mode then I'm accomplished..? ;) Thanks so much for reading!
sarkywoman: suck it Deansarkywoman on October 29th, 2010 01:55 am (UTC)
I am practically hyperventilating as I add this piece of perfection to my memories.
the female ghost of tom joad: !!! <3janie_tangerine on October 29th, 2010 10:26 pm (UTC)
This is being way too nice to me. :DD Thank you so much, I'm so glad that you liked it! :DD
nicky2007nicky2007 on October 29th, 2010 02:07 am (UTC)
Guh I this was great thank you and I will leave a better comment when my brain isn't mush.
the female ghost of tom joad: tangerinesjanie_tangerine on October 29th, 2010 10:27 pm (UTC)
\o/ I'm so glad it fit the bill, and you're welcome! :D I hope your brain recovers though. ;)
MF Luder: SPN Crowleymf_luder_xf on October 29th, 2010 08:21 am (UTC)
UNNNNNF. I think you broke my brain. Hot and great prose! This may sound odd, but I especially love that it was so easy to follow. Threesome fics can get complicated with limbs everywhere, but this one was so clear as to who was where.
the female ghost of tom joad: !!! <3janie_tangerine on October 29th, 2010 10:33 pm (UTC)
Oops, at least I hope I broke it for a good cause! ;) And thanks so much, I'm so glad that you liked it this much. :D And pheeew, that's not odd. That's actually awesome to hear because if there's something that throws me off in porn scenes is having to re-read parts because I didn't get who/what is where, so if it didn't happen then it totally makes me feel accomplished. ;)
Laraneialaraneia on October 29th, 2010 09:59 am (UTC)
This was hot and beautiful. I like the way you can almost feel the hail outside and the room only lit up by some candles.
Thank you for sharing! :D
the female ghost of tom joad: !!! <3janie_tangerine on October 29th, 2010 10:34 pm (UTC)
Thanks so very much, I'm so glad that you liked it this much. :D And you're welcome! <3
Silver M: flowers-Lmaldeluxx on October 29th, 2010 11:14 pm (UTC)
This is just perfection <3<3<3
Cute, sexy, comfortable, a great read. :D
the female ghost of tom joad: ♥janie_tangerine on October 30th, 2010 11:04 am (UTC)
Ee, thank you! :DD I'm so glad that you liked it this much. <3
(no subject) - maldeluxx on October 30th, 2010 12:04 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Rachelsubarashiine on October 30th, 2010 04:33 am (UTC)
Hnngg.... I'm fairly speechless at how HOT this fic was. I'm also totally taken aback at how well you captured the feeling of a threesome in this. Most threesome fics are basically one person tacked on to the other two people, but this was so realistic and well-done. I'll say, ahem, from personal experience that you totally wrote a GREAT threesome fic ;)
the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural team free will #3janie_tangerine on October 30th, 2010 11:09 am (UTC)
*fans* well thank you so much! *is flattered* And well, if I get approval coming from personal experience then I feel even more accomplished. :DDD (and well, I just don't really like it when it's just character A tacked to B and C and it ends there, so I was trying to make everyone involved.) I'm so glad you liked it, thanks again!
thepurpleplague: Dean is awesomethepurpleplague on October 30th, 2010 02:21 pm (UTC)
Ahhhh! This threesome just makes my life better! Awesome job! :D
the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural bobbyjanie_tangerine on October 31st, 2010 09:14 pm (UTC)
It makes me so glad to know it! ;) thank you so much. :D
wanna see a magic trick?: dean/sam/piephoenixangel13 on November 1st, 2010 05:27 am (UTC)
that song is stuck in my head now
sam/dean/cas is my absolute favourite but this was just exceptional. the love you showed between sam and dean made me so happy, and i like that that started it and then cas just wanted to be a part of something that beautiful. and it was all insanely hot as well. damn. so great <3
the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural ot3janie_tangerine on November 1st, 2010 02:19 pm (UTC)
sorry about that but I needed a title XD
eee thanks so much! :DDD I'm so glad that you liked it this much, especially if you like the ot3. There so should be more around. And it's awesome to know that I get approval on the S/D part of it because idk why but I never write it even if I ship it. ;) Thanks again! :DD <333
Re: sorry about that but I needed a title XD - phoenixangel13 on November 2nd, 2010 12:18 am (UTC) (Expand)
...: omg yaynoliperturbare on November 17th, 2010 11:15 pm (UTC)
Oh my.. that was amazing... I.. uh.. yeah. New ot3? I think so :D thanks for writing so beautifully and of course, thanks for teh hotness XD
the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural ot3 badassjanie_tangerine on November 18th, 2010 08:59 am (UTC)
New OT3 ftw! ;) Thanks so much, I'm so glad that you liked it this much. :D
Taolee: excuse me wtf are you doingtaolee on November 21st, 2010 11:59 pm (UTC)
this was SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO hot!!!

&hearts from Spain
the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural ot3janie_tangerine on November 22nd, 2010 09:21 am (UTC)
Much glad you thought so, thank you! :DDDD

(Deleted comment)
the female ghost of tom joad: supernatural + nick cave = otpjanie_tangerine on January 3rd, 2011 05:59 pm (UTC)
Well thanks so much! ;) I'm so glad that you liked it this much. And I hope it was a nice shower. ;)
goldenfish_jz: internet is for porngoldenfish_jz on January 24th, 2011 03:31 am (UTC)
Wait, I must change my underwear before making a plausible comment.

This was wonderful! I have a HUGE soft spot for this treesome, they are my OT3 <3
And I absolutely adore when writers combine hot sexy action with sweetness and love. Usually in this threesome two of them (Dean and Sam, or Dean and Castiel) are really involved and the other's just there because of one of them; I do love it when the three of them are really involved, when their love goes both ways.
Sorry, I'm babbling, it's 1:30 in the morning and this burnt more than a dozen of my neurons...
Beautifully well done! Thanks for sharing <3~
the female ghost of tom joad: porn 2.0janie_tangerine on February 17th, 2011 03:58 pm (UTC)
... why didn't I reply to this? O_o ugh sorry for the lateness really, probably I lost the notification when I got it.

And that you so much! :D I'm so happy that it worked for you, especially because I love the three of them too but for some reason I never have occasion to write them as much as I'd like. And I was really aiming to have the three of them involved because I'm really on board with the idea of more than two people managing a sorta-relationship because they all love each other, so it's totally great to know that it worked for you. Also ha sorry about your neurons, but I'm really glad that you liked it! <3